1.16.2010

"My little brat is misbehaving."

What is wrong with the title of this post? Well first off, children don't misbehave. Some of you might be sitting there ready to completely disagree with me and tell me all about how your 2 year old who hits you and screams all the time certainly misbehaves, but I would still disagree with you. Children don't misbehave, they act like children. Our society is stuck in this notion that children have to act like adults, when in reality all children are still pretty new in this world.
It's taken me 26 years to grow and learn all the things that I know, how could I possibly expect a child who has been on this earth for just a few years to know all that I do?

The second thing wrong with the title is "My little brat". Calling your child any name is extremely disrespectful, even if you are just joking. If you say these things around or to your child it could have a lasting impact on them. Your child is not being a brat, they are just being a child.

I'm a complete advocate of gentle discipline and guidance. I don't believe in time out, I don't think that making a child sit alone in a corner or a room will solve anything. The idea is to teach your child what should and should not be done, such as you shouldn't hit, you should't call names, you should share, say please and thank you. I also don't believe in hitting or spanking a child either. I believe that with open communication you can achieve the exact results you are looking for.

Let your child be a child, they only get to do it once.

1 comment:

Amber, The Unlikely Mama said...

AMEN! Children deserve the same respect as adults. If they are acting out there's usually a cause, they just don't know how to voice their issues like we do (and even we don't do it well sometimes!).

Have you read Unconditional Parenting? I'm reading it now that my daughter is one and we'll be fast approaching the time when most of the world starts to "discipline".

I'm trying to stop using the words no and good. Really, I'm trying to train myself how to explain things to Alexa now...so when she's old enough to understand better, I'll be in the habit.

BTW, I get kinda pissy with Peter (the bf/baby daddy) when he jokes and calls Alexa a "trouble maker" when she gets into things. I just don't want her to think she's "bad" because she's not old enough to get the jokes. Kids don't get sarcasm yet :-)

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